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I feel like I have such a wide following [on YouTube] now that it’s like okay if one person in real life doesn’t like what I want...I have over 70,000 people on the Internet who like what I do so I just try and focus more on that. But um it’s made me more confident I guess in my skills like marketing-wise or just being able to relate to people. I feel like I can have a conversation with pretty much anyone now and I feel really comfortable. So yes it’s made me more confident... She also talks about how dealing with the negativity has made her a stronger individual. She says that when she first started producing, she wasn’t prepared for backlash. But over time, she has learned to cope with the hate: ...I’m more confident in what I do. I’ve been doing it for so long now. I’ve experienced so much of that negativity um that I don’t really think it could get any worse. And, you know, I just don’t pay attention to that because those people just aren’t worth it, you know? I’m much happier now. By the same token, Jess talks about her concerns regarding hate on YouTube. She explains that she has only dealt with one negative comment (discussed in more detail in the Community chapter), but that she still has apprehension about receiving negative feedback. Even now I get really nervous because I see a lot of negative comments in a lot of my YouTube friends videos. And I always think ‘oh my gosh this is going to be me one day, I don’t know how to deal with it.’ But then you just get over it. You kind of just think you know what, YouTube is a community. You can’t please everyone. People either love you or hate you. Yeah, I still get that feeling every now and again. Moreover, both Euchante and EGheartsSSC confirmed that the friendships they have established through YouTube (i.e. virtual friendships) give them confidence as they participate in their offline worlds. Interestingly, EGheartsSSC cites YouTube as a mechanism that has inspired and enabled her to experiment with newfound interests and helped her to become more motivated as an individual. Consider the following remarks: [Emily]: Do you feel like you’ve changed in terms of who you are as a person through your YouTube videos? [EGheartsSSC]: Um, I think I’m definitely more like driven, like to see how far I’ve come on this like and what opportunities have come from it and certain things like that. It 123PDF Image | EXPLORING HAUL VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE: A COLLECTIVE CASE STUDY APPROACH
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